It is difficult to admit you are wrong. We all need to do it because we are all wrong at some point. My dad repeated his life motto to my brother and me: ‘I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.’ It is challenging to say the words, ‘I’m wrong.’ Even more so that I am a sinner and deserve punishment before a perfect and Holy God who created me.
Some theologians who have studied the nature of sin throughout the Bible have boiled down humanity’s rebellion to one specific characteristic: pride. Although it is multifaceted and not easily explained, one could not go wrong, in pointing to pride as the essence of our depravity.
Adam and Eve rejected God and felt they knew better; since that time, we often think we know better. At times, we assume God feels the same way we do.
When we read confessions from generations past, they often seem overly self-deprecating. They seem to modern ears to come from a place of horrible self-image. We are not that bad. However, we have swung the other way, reluctant to acknowledge not just the woefulness of humanity but also our own soul. We are often too full of ourselves. Self-deprecation, in this context, does not mean devaluing oneself, but rather a humble recognition of our flaws and a willingness to set aside one’s self interest.
The Valley of Vision: A Collection of Prayers and Devotions gets to the heart of what I am saying in this devotional. Do you relate to any of this?
Self-deprecation
O LORD,
My every sense, member, faculty, affection, is a snare to me, I can scarce open my eyes but I envy those above me, or despise those below.
I covet honor and riches of the mighty, and am proud and unmerciful to the rags of others;
If I behold beauty, it is a bait to lust, or see deformity, it stirs up loathing and disdain;
How soon do slanders, vain jests, and wanton speeches creep into my heart!
Am I comely (attractive)? what fuel for pride!
Am I deformed? what an occasion for repining!
Am I gifted? I lust after applause!
Am I learned? how I despise what I have not!
Am I in authority? how prone to abuse my trust, make my will my law, exclude others’ enjoyments, serve my own interests and policy!
Am I inferior? how much I grudge others’ pre-eminence!
Am I rich? how exalted I become!
Thou knowest that all these are snares by my corruptions, and that my greatest snare is myself. I bewail that my apprehensions are dull, my thoughts mean, my affections stupid, my expressions low, my life unbeseeming;
Yes, what canst thou expect of dust but levity, of corruption but defilement?
Keep me ever mindful of my natural state, but let me not forget my heavenly title,
or the grace that can deal with every sin.
The Joy of our salvation increases as we see what we have been saved from. Let’s think less of ourselves and more of God’s grace and doing his will.
